A RealFamilies RealFun Blog

Sep 5 2008

Traveling for business

Category: Just Me

This summer I'll be taking a few business trips. I haven't done this since I left the corporate world seven years ago and I'm excited. Usually it's Paul who gets to go to conferences or to meet with clients.

I just came back from Tulsa, Oklahoma for an Usborne Book convention. Imagine 550 women giving our company's founder a standing ovation over new children's books. I love people who love books!

For Paul it was an intensive three days of dealing with babysitters, going to Rockies baseball games and a co-worker's party, and the daily upkeep of two kids, one who is semi-potty trained and the other who is obsessed with going to play golf right now. He managed, but as he admitted, just barely. For me it was an intensive three days of traveling, going to training sessions, awards banquets, networking, book shopping, and having a luxurious hotel room to myself. Poor ol' me.

Being a good wife and mom, I would check in regularly by cell phone to make sure everyone was still alive and sane. Calling from the airport the first evening to let Paul know I arrived, I found him getting the children ready for bed. I briefly talked to Paul, Lucie, and then Nathan. Everything was fine until Nathan put his sobbing sister back on the phone.

Lucie:  "Mommy (sniff, sniff) I want you! I want you now, mommy! Mommy!" She starts crying again.

Me (at the curb waiting for the hotel shuttle trying hard not to sound like an idiot): "Oh baby. It's o.k. Mommy will be home soon. I love you. Please don't cry. It's o.k. Daddy and Nathan Boy are there. I love you. Don't cry. It's o.k. You're fine. I love you. Give the phone to Daddy please. Can you give the phone to Daddy?"

All the time I'm thinking, "I'm not going to cry. Oh my god, this sucks. I miss my baby. I'm not going to cry. How come the kids don't do this when Paul leaves? This is so damn hard, how do other parents do this?"

My next trip is in a month, lord help me.

 

Sep 4 2008

Lost in translation

Category: Family Fun

My family has its share of funny nicknames, but many of our made up words involve or are derived from food. My sister used to refer to Asbury Park (in New Jersey, near my childhood home) as Strawberry Park. But she pronounced strawberry as stowberry as in "Can we go to Stowberry Park, mommy?"

Nathan calls tomatoes, maymose. So V8s are now called Maymose Juice. He used to say sosa instead of soda. (Sosa is actually the Spanish word for soda.) So drinking a pop was "having a Sammy Sosa."
Then there's avocado or should I say, avamacodo?

Then there are the words and phrases that make life easier for Paul and me. For example, "Lucie, please stop screwing around with the DVD player. Opening and closing it constantly isn't a good thing. Putting in two DVDs at once is a great way to break it. Stop pushing all the buttons on the remote." These long, panicked sentences turn into the short but sweet, "Lucie stop messing!" It's amazing how the word messing means so many things:

• Lucie relocating her upstairs sock drawer in the downstairs toy box.
• Nathan pulling the CD drawer out of his computer.
• Lucie rearranging the contents of my wallet and diaper bag all over the foyer of a friend's home.
• Nathan pushing all the buttons at a museum exhibit just because it's fun to push all the buttons.

What fun phrases and made up words does your family use?

 

Sep 3 2008

Help I couldn't do without

Category: At Home

When I can't trade babysitting with a friend, I use one of the local moms who provide licensed daycare in their homes. They charge $40 per day per child and will take the kids last minute if they have an opening. My friend Julie, who isn't licensed, charges $40 per day for both the kids. (I've told her this is way too cheap, but she doesn't care.) Except for her two boys, and a neighbor's child, she doesn't have a regular bunch of kids she watches, so she usually has room to take my kids.

So who do I prefer? Well, it's the friend who isn't licensed. Cost isn't a factor, but it's because I like her parenting style the best. She's sweet, down to earth, and has an incredible amount of patience. I see how well behaved and smart her sons are, and know that her home is safe and kid-friendly. She's "good people" so I have confidence that my kids are well taken care of and having fun when they're with her. Plus, Nathan and Lucie both love playing with her boys and are always much better behaved with her than they are with us. (That's true for all their babysitters.)

Evenings are another matter. If I'm going to something where I'll be home by 10 p.m., and Paul's unavailable, I have Mae babysit. Mae's our 13-year-old babysitter, who Nathan is madly in love with. I've known Mae's mom, Lynda, for a few years now. She was on the founding board of Nathan's school and now works there as a first grade teacher.

According to the principal, Mae is one of the smartest kids in Nathan's school. She's also adored by many of her mother's students and their moms. In fact, if there's an event at school and I need her to babysit, I make sure to book Mae before anyone else does. And boy do I hear it from my friends when I've scooped her services. They jokingly accuse me of using my influence as president of the board. Nope, I just know how popular she is and book her months in advance.

But for those late, late nights when we go downtown, we have Conida, a college student. Her dad works with Paul and Paul knows her when they both played on the company sponsored co-ed softball team before he had third knee surgery and had to quit playing. We've been having her come to the house since she was a senior in high school. The first time she sat for us was during Paul's company's holiday party. We booked a room upstairs at the Omni and Conida watched the kids while we partied downstairs. It was a great way to "test drive" her.

She's pre-med in college now, very responsible, and still a little on the nerdy side like her dad. The kids adore her and she's very inexpensive, too, about $5 per hour for both kids. We always end up giving her a couple of hours more since she drives a long way to come out. But she's usually available and even brings her own food, since she works part-time at Quizno's and picks up a sandwich on her way over.

Then there are the college nannies who we use when we can't get Conida. Recommended by friends, they get $10 per hour for both kids. While they are very trustworthy and the kids love them, an evening out becomes extremely expensive.

But when Nana's here? We can go to meetings, run errands, have adult time, and stay out overnight without having to worry about making childcare arrangements. It's break time for me and Paul, and she encourages us to take advantage of her being here. Still we don't push it. After all, she's in her late '70s and the kids have a tendency to tire her out. (Heck, they tire ME out after just a half an hour.)

Even with all these choices, it's not perfect. Occasionally, the daycare moms are booked up or out of town or it's too cold to fly Nana out. Wondering how other parents manage sometimes, I thank my lucky stars, knock on wood, and say a little prayer. I'm very fortunate to work at home and have such a flexible schedule -- and have good friends to count on in a pinch.